February 13, 2007

I’m really only posting tonight for the sake of reminding myself I have this blog and that I intend to keep it up.

I’ve had what feels like the longest day in history, woken at 6.30am, up at 7am, out by 8am, 40 minutes early for work, a hellish journey back from work which meant we didn’t get home until past 6pm. I’ve had terrible stomach ache today too, I’m not entirely sure what’s up, but it feels like a cross between trapped wind, constipation, diarrhoea, and the feeling that my womb is about to drop out. As a result, I’m not even sure if I’ve been hungry today. I didn’t feel like eating at work, so I stuck to coffee and water, and more for the sake of having eaten something rather than anything else, I made a chicken and bacon salad for tea.

Atkins is going OK, providing it isn’t MEAT OVERLOAD that’s giving me a gippy stomach. I have emailed my Lighterlife counsellor tonight to tell her I won’t be continuing, and am still awaiting a reply from the counsellor I emailed on the weekend. Should I not hear from her by Wednesday, I will give her a call on Thursday.

Tonight will be a very early night, I’m shattered. I’d like to go to bed now, but to go before 10pm, for me, would mean waking up at daft ‘o clock in the morning. I’m hoping that having gone easy on the meat, having only 2 coffees, and nothing else but water today, will mean that I feel better tomorrow. Although tomorrow is Valentines day. Bleh. I don’t really subscribe to the whole thing, I haven’t bought my boyfriend a card or anything, but when everyone around you is constantly talking about the lovely evenings they are spending with their other halves, and how wonderful it is to be with them, it just drives it home how very far away he is, and how very very lovely it would be after a day like this, to have him here next to me on the sofa.

Thursday I will be taking Ella over to mum’s to ride her bicycle, and to be able to sit and enjoy a coffee and a cigarette with someone. Thursday evening I have a friend coming over, we’ll be making icing kittens to stand atop a birthday cake for another good friend. My boyfriend will also be over on Thursday night, but his train doesn’t arrive until just before midnight, and so I will probably be fast asleep by the time he gets here.

Friday I look forward to very much. Despite my hideous lack of money, we are going to the National Railway Museum, taking Ella to see Thomas The Tank Engine. She’s already excited about it, and asking to see him every day. As she is so small, and can’t really grasp time very well yet, I can only tell her that we aren’t going to see Thomas until mummy’s boyfriend is here. It should be great fun, and worth the money I think. I’m not sure who will enjoy it the most, Ella or Lewis.

Saturday once Ella has gone to her dads, we haven’t anything planned until the evening. I’ve bought us tickets to see Hot Fuzz at the cinema on an early evening showing. When we get back I suspect we may partake of some dinner, which I reckon HE can cook, and quite possibly a few drinks. We might try to make up for the boringness of our anniversary celebration! Having read up, I know that vodka has zero carbs, as does Coke Zero, therefore I think I can allow myself something. We were possibly going for a night out in West Yorkshire for a friend’s birthday (the friend the cake is for), but I can’t afford the petrol, and I don’t trust myself to drink when I will be surrounded by all manner of food I shouldn’t have. Alcohol really weakens my resolve and I’d rather not put myself in that position. At least having a drink at home doesn’t pose a problem, as all that’s in the house is what I can have.

I have ordered some low carb goodies from an online store, and am awaiting delivery of some zero carb marshmallows which I shall take to the cinema with me, some low carb tortilla wraps, a bottle of low carb sweet and sour sauce, some weird gelatinous zero carb noodle things (I am hoping to make some sort of stir fry with them, some chicken, some broccoli, & a bit of the sweet & sour sauce. God knows what they will be like though.) , and some cheesy snack things. There are some wonderful things available, all manner of zero carb sweets, low carb chocolates, low carb cake mixes, but I can’t afford any of them really. I shouldn’t even have indulged in what I’ve already ordered, but I do think it’s important to have some variety doing Atkins, it helps you stick to it.

Weight wise, I have no idea what is happening. My scales read drastically different at all times of the day on different days of the week. They’re so unreliable, I might just get rid of them. I will weigh myself on mum’s scales on Thursday to see what they say, they are usually accurate. I weighed 16st 8lbs on hers before I started Lighterlife, and last week when I was on them they said 15st 9lbs. I can’t imagine a reason why I wouldn’t be lighter than that by Thursday, but I have no idea by how much, so we’ll see. Fingers crossed. Again.


2 Responses to “Day…..something.”

  1. Good Luck, Please kee p us all updated about your progress

  2. Mally said

    how are you doing?

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